[WarOnPrivacy]

The stigma against revealing harmful tendencies kills a powerful method of thwarting that behavior - self-outing.

I often (to generally good effect) out myself as a child abuser. This is narrowly possible because my abuse was strictly verbal - which is marginally allowed by society.

The benefits of being able to speak openly (with empathy and careful consideration) about my bad behavior are huge.

For starters, it encourages my children to speak and think about their mistreatment as a matter-of-fact aspect of their lives. Factoring that reality helps them be more self-aware.

Also, constantly keeping sunshine on my bad behavior degrades the ability of that behavior to exist in harmful, self-sustaining cycles.

This also gives me a good position to speak on the sexual, physical and emotional mistreatment I received. I can explain how the people who hurt me were themselves shaped by abuse - which is a deeply unpopular thing to consider.

The overall reality is this. By believing the only appropriate way to think of perpetrators is with shame and rage, we are insuring the creation of more perpetrators.