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Let your wife be your wife. You be you. Kids are naturally curious, especially boys. I have both. My daughter is bright and a straight A student, but she and her friends lack the adventuresome nature boys have. My boys are game for anything that involves spaceships, science, animals, fishing, etc. They wanted to know how fish worked, so I cut a catch open and showed them what a fish looked like inside: eyes, brain, intestines, etc. Kids need to see this stuff. They need to know where their food comes from. Trips to organic farms, fisheries, deer rendering if you hunt. My wife has a doctorate. She's very intelligent, far more than I am, if I'm honest, but... she cares nothing for anything other than her field. Nothing. She won't entertain ideas other than her own. I love her to death, but she's very narrow minded. My parents (deceased) were chalk and cheese. My mother was sweet and loving. Her skills ended there. My father was likely a genius on many levels. There was nothing he couldn't suss out. I was having issues compiling a program written in Basic one day in 1983. He was an Ada/C guy and in 10 seconds saw the issue and had me correct it. He was a math wizard--had to be--he designed flight systems that people's lives depended on. He was anal retentive to the nth degree and that rubbed off on me. He always said, "Son, if you're going to do anything, do it as if your life and others depend on it." He even had me PM my own bicycles and the lawn mower. My mother was distant in many respects and died an alcoholic. Maybe she felt like she never fit in. I don't know. Her parents, my grandparents, were very educated and well read. Odd. Like you, I find it incredibly frustrating that I cannot get an Arduino or Raspberry Pi project launched and share it with my wife. Her eyes glaze over and she's actually said, "I'm not interested." My kids are too young to grok what I'm doing and don't have the patience yet to learn (yet). She likes those brain dead games and TV shows that offer zero in the way of intellectual worth. I love anything sci-fi, coding, fishing, woodworking, etc. Don't lower your expectations. I would try and find common ground with her in something you both enjoy and let that be your communal source of joy with your wife. You need you time and so does she. Parenting is no joke and she is performing an unpaid job that is high stress. Take the kid out, just you and the kid. Give her some downtime to recharge. Women love that stuff. Just what works for me. |
Amen that parenting is no joke. She's a trooper with our kid and is way more patient and persevering that I am. I'm very thankful for her.
Thank you for your sharing and advice. I have this whole subthread bookmarked.