[learnvella]

To me there's a bigger question of: are the lattes or the 60k car actually bringing you joy? especially when had regularly? Most people if asked what brings them happiness it's quality time spent with loved ones, self improvement, or bringing other people joy- things like this. But then we forget about it and act like not having a latte regularly will negatively impact one's happiness over the long term.

[hn_throwaway_99]

I think you're kinda missing my point. First, the difference is not between the 60k car and nothing. It's between a 60k car and a 45k car. Yes, personal preferences differ, but it's pretty easy to spend an extra 15k on a car like that for things that have really marginal utility.

But more importantly, I'd much rather spend small amounts on simple daily pleasures that I enjoy. The lattes definitely bring me joy, and it's not like they are somehow taking the place of quality time with my loved ones or bringing joy to other people.

[moojacob]

> it's not like they are somehow taking the place of quality time with my loved ones or bringing joy to other people.

Then we want the same thing. Genuine happiness. But try to see it our way: that coffee money could go to working 5 hours less a week in a decade. That could be quality time with your family. One the other hand, two years into that latte — you're hitting withdrawal by 3:00pm. So maybe your just as happy overall as when you started.

[bumby]

Some psychologists define two types of happiness, the “experiencing” type (enjoying a latte in the present) and a “reflecting” happiness (the joy of looking back on self improvement). They aren’t necessarily mutually exclusive