[ipi]

I guess everyone has a point in life they realise they are not in the same mental state they want to be in. Growing up with lot of issues in the family and financial trouble. I kind of dumped me into work head first and used that as a tool to distract myself from everything around me. No social life. No hanging out with the friends, family or co workers.

While I did good at work I was kind of viewed as the serious person whom you don't go to for small talk. On top of that added up more responsibility with our necessarily getting more benefits( since am not that fun person to hang out with or to be around) This put me in an eternal state of anxiety with every increasing load of work and my issues compounding.

It finally led to a burnout of massive level where I started hating my work and gave up reading or writing anything technical. I couldn't force myself to even write a small program. I constantly doubted myself. Kicked myself for all the small things and abused myself literally.

Then finally I came to terms and took a break. Accepted that work is just another part of the whole life. No one dies if I don't work for a day or fail to deliver the project. But, there are people in my life who get worried if I don't call them in a week. Its good to have the around and value them.

Again, don't have any practical solutions but you need to know the value of the things you are dealing with. You need to prioritise them at each level.