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by killswitched 2137 days ago
Still here trying to finish for years now

It hasn't worked yet

I still fear death

And don't see that changing

Which is a conundrum especially now, being a middle aged burned out white male American college drop out homeless with a ruined reputation

I just want to be left alone not asking help

I gave my small fortune away about seven figures

I live in a vehicle and dream of being dead day in and day out

Wanted out for a long long time

I'm certainly not alone in this feeling but most rational folks will at least take care of themselves and not entirely sabotage their future

Too many unresolved incidents

Bullies in life: childhood, university, adulthood, workplace

No faith in the species

No desire to be alive

I'll probably be gone from suicide at some point before retirement

I think the species is shit

And this naturally is in total conflict with the will of most people

Just want to be left alone so I can finish the job already

Far too many unresolved incidents

Tech makes life worse in many ways by the way

For example I can't escape my ruined reputation one google search away

That will outlive me by a long shot