[adamsea]

You're absolutely right. It's not an excuse, and the example/hypothetical I shared would be a violation of my ideals.

But that's my point. We're flawed. Which isn't an excuse. It's like, when the experts talk about how to change habits, they say the best way to do it is to change your environment. Because of the powerful influence our environment has upon us.

And most models of change for behaviors like smoking or weight loss (and it's becoming increasing clear that computers/screens/apps/the internet share the addictive qualities of those behaviors) incorporate relapse as one step of a change process.

It's an old book and a simple one, but as far as I know their research on how people successfully change behavior still holds up: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/46680.Changing_for_Good

Most studies show, I think, that positive motivation is a better tool than shaming/blaming/judging, in most situations.