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by nouveau0 2146 days ago
I feel you. I'm going through the same thing. I'm an introvert who recently became extrovert and I can't do 90% of the activities that made me an extrovert.

Here's how I'm coping:

1. Reactivated my introvert side with

   a) Reading more books

   b) Learning to play music

   c) Online singing lessons

   d) Exercising at home: i) Strength ii) Following through Supple Leopard (book)
2. Going outside once a day for a walk. No exceptions.

3. Chill at the emptiest park on the weekend.

4. Going on a hike during on some weekends.

5. Small talk and saying Hi to random people on the street.

6. Cleaning the house

4 comments

(same profile & problems here)

I started two weeks ago with #2 (a ~10 minutes walk in the morning) and it does seem to have a positive impact (more relaxed while working, less feeling of being "stuck at home").

Concerning #1a I started reading again some books that I already read in the past, but in a different language.

Additionally: cooking. I previouly used to cook just some veeery basic stuff but now I tend to experiment more and raise a little bit the difficulty level (e.g. Tom Kha Gai soup, fish cooked in the owen, etc...) => interesting, and it changes a bit your usual day, and it provides something about which you can talk to other people => nice (but dangerous - always have a plan B available, hehe)

How can someone change from introvert to extrovert. As per my current understanding this kind of thing is a very fundamental personality trait. Not saying it's impossible to change, but curios how to do so.
I never view it as a binary situation. I personally see myself moving along the scale between the two based on situation and my mood. I view myself as mostly introverted but occasionally surprise not only myself but also wife with my extroversion when the conditions are right.

Perhaps the original poster just found the right conditions for their extroversion to blossom.

It's all mindset...I leaned introvert in high school and was locked inside for 1-2 years coding after college, went hard INTJ. 18 months later, after a lot of small changes (moved, added a friend group, got an apartment in the hip part of town, pitched investors, more employees), I was a hard ESFP

It really makes me hurt to be stuck by myself for this long again. There's some net benefits to introversion (more time, mostly), but theyre minimal and don't increase much

Myers-Briggs is a state measurement, not a trait measurement.

Filed under yet another reason why Myers-Briggs sucks.

For me it was mostly a matter of managing my anxiety, once I had a better handle on it I had way more bandwidth for being social and was able to enjoy it and be energized by it.
As others said, I don't think of it being introvert/extrovert as black-and-white. I think the most effective ways to add qualities of an extrovert were:

1. Ask yourself why do you have to be an extrovert. Several advantages come to mind: More connections, more confidence, better relationships, no stage fear, better small-talk, better dating life etc.

2. Understanding why you don't like being social/going outside. Write about it. Start from the first moment. Is it because of your parents? Did your siblings make fun of you for expressing your emotions/feelings? Is it your classmates in kindergarten/primary/secondary.. etc.

3. Now that you understand the cause, have hobbies that make you an extrovert. Covid examples: Online group lessons, hiking, walking in the park. Post/Pre-covid examples: Social dancing lessons, Meetup.com (weird crowd sometimes but hang in there), group lesson in any topic you're interested in, toastmasters, team sports. Think of something you always wanted to do.

I think another option would be to accept being an introvert and not see it as bad thing that has to be changed.
I don't think it's a bad thing. Although, being an extrovert gives you some privileges you don't normally have when you're an introvert. Same thing applies if you're exclusively extroverted
From my experience introversion is relative to your environment, so if you move or get some new friends maybe that might help.
You can change almost anything about your personality.
Thanks for sharing this list, those sound like healthy activities.

Could you share how you're doing those online signing lessons? Is there a specific website, or did you find a personal teacher and get lessons via zoom/Skype? I'd be very interested in hearing about that.

Yes, I started 1-1 lessons with a local teacher about year ago. Now, we're doing it over Skype. Since we already know each other it works well. I feel that real-time feedback is essential for beginners like me.
Thanks for getting back to me on this, I appreciate it.
Do you use a service for online singing lessons? Or just Youtube videos?
I started taking lessons with a local teacher about a year ago. It's the same now but over Skype, even though we live about a mile away from each other lol