[ZephyrBlu]

> Because many also enjoy the experience of being admired or envied by others, perhaps even more than the original experience itself

...

> I have many acquaintances who go to great lengths and expenses for an experience they don't particularly enjoy but which pays off on social media

That's my whole point. No wonder people are unhappy when they rely on external things for happiness and fulfillment. It's peak stupidity.

I don't believe what you're describing is sustainable long term.

I think Jim Carrey said it best: "I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer."

[buran77]

> I don't believe what you're describing is sustainable long term.

I'm describing things that have been happening for millennia: people seeking the admiration of others even at great cost for themselves. Social media is the last manifestation, in line with modern times. It's still the same drug just obtained via different means.

I don't know how sustainable it is, if social media puts us above the sustainability threshold by making this practice more accessible to the masses. But as the article states people have put up with a lot of permanent downsides (e.g. a long uncomfortable daily commute) for the fleeting joy of the upside (e.g. having a bigger bedroom).

On the other hand social media allows people to get that satisfaction with a one time investment. One fancy trip = one big dose of admiration from thousands of people. Your grandparents had to take a mortgage to get this effect. Entire industries were created purely to satisfy such needs, anything containing "luxury" is a good point to start. Of course there are many other implications here but while we can agree it's probably not good that so many rely on this for their daily life happiness, it's hard to quantify how bad.

Anecdotally the worst outcome I've seen from social media induced disillusionment was couples falling apart because the more immature one lived "inside" social media and real life didn't provide any of the same highs. The disappointment took a sledgehammer to what was probably a shaky foundation but still.

[ZephyrBlu]

I don't disagree that this has been going on for millennia. I think humans are far less rational than we pretend to be (Myself included).

From the article: "The problem is, we consistently make decisions that suggest we are not so good at distinguishing between ephemeral and lasting pleasures. We keep getting it wrong".

I believe social media massively exacerbates this phenomenon rather than making it sustainable.

> Of course there are many other implications here but while we can agree it's probably not good that so many rely on this for their daily life happiness, it's hard to quantify how bad

It's a slippery slope to me. If you don't eliminate the need for external validation it snowballs, just like an addiction.

Note that I'm not saying external validation is inherently bad, but relying on it is. We all like getting praise and compliments, but relying on them to prop ourselves up is a recipe for disaster.

[skinnymuch]

> I think Jim Carrey said it best: "I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer."

Focusing on the “rich” part here.

Money can help a lot. I’ve been in positions in life with and without excess money. I wasn’t happy in either situation, but the lack of extra money is far worse.

I know many people feel pride in working for money, but I find that lacking as much as going for experiences for social media clout. I enjoy working, but having to work for 40 years on assigned work in order to have a home, healthy food, et al, is not the answer.