[662587649495439]

I have been suffering from anxiety and depression for the majority of my adult life. Recent events have had an interesting effect on this. I was following the COVID-19 news in early January and I felt very anxious all the time. Strangely, my anxiety felt lighter when my country of residence locked down. I've seen this reported elsewhere too. I think seeing everyone reacting to the outbreak was almost comforting to me. For the first time in my life, people were reacting to an event with anxiety in the same way that I was. I no longer felt that anxiety was a disability but rather a reasonable response to events. Purchases of supplies slowly over a period of 8 weeks before lockdown proved a wise move and family members commented on my sensible reactions. Behavior that I have been trying to eradicate with therapy and medication for many years had proven to be the right choice.

This experience seems to have confused my brain. I am questioning old patterns of thinking and having to establish boundaries for negative thought-patterns again. It feels very odd and I feel I have gone backwards many years in my mental health development. My thoughts go out to the many people suffering from these problems, indeed many much worse than I.