[stareatgoats]

> I wonder how many people on HN have experienced being the only person of their race in the room

I have that experience. In my 6th and 7th grade I attended a school in rural Tanzania. It was in the years following Tanzania's independence from colonial rule and there was a certain resentment towards us Europeans harbored by (many) teachers and students, and I was many times harassed and/or ridiculed, and subjected to corporal punishment for the slightest offense (in my own view at least). I have plenty of "charm and charisma" (again in my own view!) but could never get accustomed to the treatment. And indeed felt I shouldn't have to and so was eventually taken out and home schooled instead.

Now, did this break me, make me despondent or not believe in myself? It id not, and the reason is context. Because even if (many) young Tanzanians resented us Europeans, many if not most of the elderly did not. As a 12 year old it was not uncommon for me to be greeted with "shikamoo"(roughly meaning "I kiss the dust off your feet"), a greeting normally reserved for really old people - and people within the colonial administration. I was also treated as someone potentially very rich (not that I was, except relatively only). I still did not come away from the experience completely unscathed but that is another story.

I could go on but in short; being singled out or even maltreated on basis of skin color because people see you as privileged is something quite different than being disrespected because your skin color signals relative under-privilege. Which should give pause I believe. It may take a long while yet until our ethnically related appearances no longer play any role in our relationships.