[jmole]

you literally need 2 5.1k resistors attached to your USB-C connector to get 5V@3A out of any PD compliant charger.

And yet, even the Raspberry Pi foundation messed this up when they designed the first revision of Raspberry Pi 4.

It's easy to say "USB-C is a mess", but we should really be shaming the individual companies who mess this up. The spec is public, parsable by any competent EE, and there's tons of vendor support for standards-compliant solutions.