[BeetleB]

> telling them “I could be interested in a variety of relationships with you” is so much more indirect than asking “wanna get dinner?”

While you may be correct that his statement wasn't direct, I would say your alternative would be the very definition of "indirect".

Being direct in such situations may not be the best approach, and I suspect that is what you're trying to get at. However, "wanna get dinner?" when you want something more than just dinner is almost a textbook definition of indirect.

[7532yahoogmail]

In human relations a kind of Kolmogorov complexity measure in which we communicate the most information in the least symbols or words --- well illustrated with your 'wanna get dinner' --- I think is adjacent to directness and openness. That is, why was it a guy can't spit it out? I like you and wanna get dinner with you? Fear, feeling, and self-esteem issues more likely. Now, it's probably not street smart to have that out with the potential invitee, however, being open about those feelings with a good friend in a hear-to-heart so that it enables one to move forward more directly to me seems like a win.

[dondawest]

I think it’s the most direct way to communicate because the connotations are so culturally well-understood.

“Wanna get dinner and maybe have sex?” might be more direct in a textbook way but it’s also unecessary because the second part is already implied, and unecessary words make a question less direct IMO.

I think “wanna get dinner” is the most direct way possible of stating your intentions unless you’re talking to someone who’s not familiar with, or can’t interpret, cultural shorthand.

This dude’s article could alternately be titled “my experiment with treating everyone like they have autism and seeing how that makes them feel.” Prediction: not great