My main problem is that I got into a big company straight out of school and there were not any opportunities for me. I have been working on systems like FileNet and Neoxam. This greatly limited my opportunity to do something else. Now that I'm married and have a kid, I can't afford to change companies. When I joined the company I could recite pertainate parts of meetings verbatim, but not anymore. I feel potential I had was squandered.
The team I am currently on is finally using some AWS, but i feel the project level leadership is short sighted and the subject matter is extremely boring.
I totally understand you and I know changing the situation can sometimes be way harder than what people would assume...
I heard a heartwarming story recently from Brandon Sanderson. He was saying in his writing class that a full-time writer has an advantage, but don't worry if you can't afford being a full-time writer! If you only write for 4 hours a week, after a year you would have a novel. You have even less time? It would take 2 years but you gonna have your novel eventually. The important thing is consistency...
As an outsider it's not my place to give you any advice. And I know it's not gonna be easy. But I want to encourage you to pursuit what you like to do! It maybe take more time but eventually it's achievable...
I'll just work at my shitty job until I win the lottery, die, or get fired. No one is entitled to happiness, so as long as I can pay my bills I guess that's the best I can hope for.
A growth mindset, having a plan, real effort and of-course some luck/support, are things that I believe in.
I suggest this thought-provoking TEDx talk:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pN34FNbOKXc&app=desktop