[kick]

In most modern western societies your spouse that you cheat on can indeed very easily leave you any time she or he wants to, and they're certainly not powerless in either a legal or practical exit sense.

Not during the early 1900s, which is what's being discussed here. Also, "any time she or he wants to" is a complete misrepresentation of today's situation, as well.

And no, cheating on someone sexually or romantically is not the same as abusing them in any legal sense,

I didn't claim it was abusive, I claimed it was a terrible thing to do. I claimed that his abusive behavior was abusive, which is true.

Your entire argument is based around strawmanning against an argument that wasn't being made.