I just don't see societies impressions about gender roles changing anytime soon.
Woman are still taught that they have to be hard to get and can't come off as "easy".
And Men are largely taught that getting a Woman is a conquest or somehow contributing to them "being a man".
Also I do feel the need to point out that on Grindr much of the same things that would be considered harassment on other apps is still there, it is just assumed to be part of the Grindr experience and not seen as harassment (by most at least).
(Purposefully not throwing in Trans here since that further complicates what I am trying to say and makes the assumed power differences even more problematic)
Also btw, if it isn't clear by now. I am saying this as someone on Grindr and other gay apps.
My profile isn't necessarily shy, but all of these things have happened and yes, it is expected to be part of the territory.
1. People calling me by my name in the first message. Because they know me and think its funny, despite them having no profile picture nor identifying themselves, etc.
2. Nudes. Lots. Unsolicited. Every angle, every sight, no crevice left un-illuminated.
3. A level of straight-forwardness that I'm not even comfortable fully describing here, as an example, on a throwaway. Near-interrogations about interest in fetishes, positions or play-by-plays of what is going to go down on a given meetup.
4. Calculation. Every gay man on Grindr knows the game. "You interested?". If the answer is "yes", then the answer is "maybe" - they're talking to someone hotter and seeing if it will work out. If it was going to work out, you'd have swapped numbers or one person would be on the move. There's games here too.
5. Bluntless. Such a time saver when someone says "not interested, good luck hunting". Rudeness. Some people have less tact when doing it.
6. Invasive questions. Are you clean (a bad way of asking if STD free), are you clean (a somewhat fair question about your ability to receptively bottom), how big is your penis, how fat are you, etc. Though I have never been asked how tall I was...
Anyway, I know lots of men that are completely turned off by this and I can fit more fingers in my nose than it takes to count the number of women (whom I know) that would opt into this experience. And yes, these aspects are integral to the Grindr experience, it wouldn't be Grindr and it wouldn't be popular without it.
Grindr is cool, but I feel like Tinder has already lowered the barrier for casual sex for straight people.... and uh, that's not solving any of the long-tail issues being discussed in this thread.
I just don't see societies impressions about gender roles changing anytime soon.
Woman are still taught that they have to be hard to get and can't come off as "easy".
And Men are largely taught that getting a Woman is a conquest or somehow contributing to them "being a man".
Also I do feel the need to point out that on Grindr much of the same things that would be considered harassment on other apps is still there, it is just assumed to be part of the Grindr experience and not seen as harassment (by most at least).
(Purposefully not throwing in Trans here since that further complicates what I am trying to say and makes the assumed power differences even more problematic)
Also btw, if it isn't clear by now. I am saying this as someone on Grindr and other gay apps.