| I think that's a symptom. Not a cause. A lot has to do with how cultures perceive individuals and individuality. Traditionally, individuality has always been seen as something "bad". ingroup/outgroup, cultural norms to abide by, etc. etc. Sociology, anthropology,... there are entire research domains devoted to these questions. The interesting part is how society has evolved over the past 200, 100 and 50 years. Industrialisation, mass media, the information age,... have all stripped away the traditional tribal or clan-like way of living which has kept us alive for hundreds of thousands of years. Over the past 50 years, individual consumerism and producerism have come to dominate our societal framework. So, we are taught to look at relationships as affordances that help us to advance in a materialistic world; rather then to look at the deep intangible value they embody. And we are also taught that emotions are only really valid if they are useful or contributing to our well-being. What I hear from younger people is this notion of suffering from social anxiety. I'm sure that's a real thing. It's not easy to approach another human being and try and befriend them; and it's harder as we become older. But building meaningful relationships is also a learned skill which takes tons of time. And the journey starts first and foremost with learning to befriend yourself through self-aware kindness, compassion and empathy. For one, it starts by not beating yourself up over stuff you don't control. Or trying to adhere to an irealistic ideal. And it also consists of calling out those who push ideals that nobody can ever hope to attain. (Yeah, sure, Elon does great stuff. But neither you nor I are like Elon. You do you, go for it if you want to give it a shot, but who are you to judge what I do with my life?). The problem with social media is that they tie into our innate urge to connect with others; but at the same time push this idea that we all need to have our separate, successful materialistic lives. It's a disparity that only enhances the anxiety that's already there. And the only good way to deal with it is to wean yourself from your device as best as you can. |
Anecdotal, and not to dismiss that reality, but I find the opposite to be true. It is easy to befriend people, with no strings attached. We have a lot in common with almost everybody.