[JoelMcCracken]

I grew up in rural Pennsylvania and moved to Pittsburgh for Uni about a decade ago. My wife and I are making plans to move to the country, for me returning, but for her living there for the first time.

When in the city we both feel low levels of chronic stress. This is alleviated when in rural areas.

Right now our worries are finding a place for the right price, sufficiently removed from other people, close to enough places that we care about, access to fast internet.

I have heard from real estate agents that this desire to move to the country is becoming increasingly common. I don't know really why that is, but I have to imagine that the ability to work remotely has something to do with it.

[shantly]

Good public schools (or good private schools, for that matter) can be hard to come by out in the sticks, for those to whom that's important. Hard in the city, too—there's a reason so many families, even those of us who would prefer either the city or the country, end up in the 'burbs.

[nikanj]

In a big city, your kid won't fit into the kindergarten. In the sticks, there is no kindergarten.

Things suck for young middle-class families.

[shantly]

Between the money-based fight to get your kids in better schools (public or private, it's money either way, just a matter of whether the money's in tuition or housing) and health care it does kind of seem like the system's designed to eat every last dollar a normal to well-off-but-not-actually-rich family can get their hands on.

[JoelMcCracken]

of course, these people pay a lot of the taxes. the rich don't, and poor just don't have the money to pay.

[JoelMcCracken]

Great point; for us, we do not want children and are sure they are not coming, so this does not factor into our considerations.

[bart_spoon]

My hunch is that it’s driven by the millennial generation entering the child rearing stage of life. The increased preference for urban environments was largely driven by millennials. But many of the things appealing about the city lose their luster when you stop being a single adult and now have a family to consider.

Housing goes from expensive to unaffordable when you can’t split the difference between roommates, and can’t justify living in a run down 1 bedroom closet anymore. Schools are often poor in the city, and the ones that aren’t are often very difficult to get into. Public transportation is great, until you have a child or a stroller, in which case you draw looks like you have the plague. Most of the amenities that make city life enjoyable as a young person become difficult or impossible to enjoy in the presence of children.

This isn’t necessarily the case for all cities, especially those outside the US. But for the most part, American cities are fundamentally broken for families, and as such are mostly playgrounds for the young, the rich, or those so poor they can’t leave and are confined to the corners of town where “urban life” isn’t as glamorous as is often sold. My desire for living in the city took a nosedive soon after having my first child.

It also probably isn’t entirely child driven. Even without kids, I think the 30+ stage of life is when many aspects of city life become less appealing. As you put it, city life is often accompanied by chronic low level stress, which eventually just gets old. Living in a city is great for a career, but at a certain point, careers start to calm down and the need for being in a urban center starts to die with it.