[nailer]

> I think, generally, everyone should try to use that phrasing, because it opens the door to discussion in a way that a command doesn't.

I think the opposite. Nothing personal, but I've used the deferential style for years and the ambiguity and false deference can cloud things.

Person X may not want to do task Y. They might be more interested in their current task. They might not think it's their responsibility. If you don't want to discuss it, don't leave the door open to discussion.

"Person X: drop everything and work on task Y. Thanks."

[mlyle]

I generally want the employee to have the option to discuss it. But I also want them to use this option responsibly and to provide appropriate context in their discussion. If they repeatedly don't, a different style of communication is needed with them.