[jclulow]

Literally nothing will prepare you for that. No amount of time is enough. Living your life in abject fear of that morbid possibility is crippling.

[DanBC]

"spending time with my kids" is not "living in crippling fear of them dying".

[sokoloff]

It sounded like you were opposed to doing mundane daily chores or otherwise not giving 100% of your free time to them while they're awake for fear that you might regret that choice if they died young of cancer. That doesn't seem that far apart to this reader.