Help me. My job killed my enthusiasm.

[frodo01]

I used to love programming and creating and even impressing others with what I could create out of nothing, while in college. I joined my first job a year ago. I hated my project, hated the team, hated the api. But I could not identify the problem so I did not quit. I then spent a year coding stuff I hated till I quit recently. I can no longer feel any burning desire to make anything. I started four pet projects in one month and left them all in the middle.

I see wonderful people in HN; people who have created startups, money, value and I want to do what they have done. But I can't feel that it matters. I have a job that pays me well. Why should I do more? I'm terrified that I've lost my answer to that question.

I want to feel the adrenaline but I have forgotten how to get there. Why should I do anything worthy?

[dwc]

I've been there. Several times, actually. A few things that may apply to you...

* If you started 4 projects you obviously still have desire. Don't push yourself. Maybe just keep tabs on interesting things, or maybe poke around in a new language, or look into anything you're curious about without any commitments.

* Even a really good day job in programming can take away energy for side/personal projects. In fact, the better the job the less mental energy I have left for my own stuff. I wish it were different, but I've mostly come to accept it.

* The world is full of small things that you can do to make your life better. When you find something repetitive in your life, consider writing something to take care of it. Doing small things to keep busy and improve your life is a nice way to get the joy back. Keep it small and simple to start, so you're not face with a big project you don't have the enthusiasm to complete. Do things you can finish quickly.

Good luck!

[ecommando]

I hear ya.

#1 Do something else - It's time to take a break. Do something completely different, unrelated to programming.

If you're like me, and it sounds like you might be, that's what it takes to make the mind miss what it knows best, and you'll soon find yourself coming up with ideas around what your doing, and chomping at the bit to dive into the technical aspects of them.

#2 Take it slow - small projects, small victories. Set your goals very low and achieve each one as a stepping stone.

If you have the ability, funds, and time, do some traveling. If not, do a lot of reading... fiction, and NO HN. Seeing other people do stuff (most of which is inane and inconsequential) only makes one feel impatient. Disconnect completely for a week or two and let your body and mind rest.

Cheers!

[hasenj]

> Why should I do anything worthy?

Because your future doesn't rely on you having a job now, it relies on you continually improving and sharpening your skills. Does your current job give you that? No, it does the opposite; it kills you. By getting out of it, you're doing your future self a favor.

I was kinda half-way there. I just quit my day job last week.

First advice: don't rush back into hacking. Give yourself sometime to cool off, just lay back and relax (metaphorically). Do whatever things you enjoy in life, maybe your thing is watching shows/movies, reading books, going out, get into something interesting like music, martial arts, whatever.

> But I can't feel that it matters. I have a job that pays me well. Why should I do more? I'm terrified that I've lost my answer to that question.

1. Your job is rotting your brain. I think you already know that.

2. You don't have to have a startup idea that works to quit. It's not about having a particular idea. It's about hacking and solving problems.

I'm sure you can regain your enthusiasm after some relaxation time, and when you do, just hack on stuff, don't worry about having to do any real project.

"Real stuff" comes when you just casually go about solving problems.

At the very least, by working on problems you find interesting, in your own time, you can refresh your hacking muscles, gain experience, get more stuff to put on your resume, and then find a better job.

[smharris65]

A long time ago something about computers sparked your interest and curiosity. You followed that spark maybe not even knowing where it would take you. Now the "real" world doesn't care about that spark, but they CANNOT put it out. Only you can. Go way back and find that time in the beginning that started it all. Re-connect with your first experience. That's what got you this far and it's what will keep you going. It's what I always focus on, and this is my twentieth year as a software developer.

[calebmpeterson]

Hang in there. I'll second the advice to find something else you love and do that for a while instead of programming. If you like reading (a lot), try Robert Jordan's A Wheel of Time. Learn a little about cooking. Learn a little about playing a musical instrument; the bass is good - you don't have to be good at all to have fun playing along with your favorite bands.

Otherwise learn something new and unrelated to your day job but still in the programming realm. Learn Erlang or JavaScript. Make sure it has a REPL - the Chrome console is a great REPL for JS. Have fun with it! Don't worry about making something of "value" just make something small that's only purpose is to make you smile.

Hang in there; you'll get through this season.

[10smom]

I am looking for someone like you that can lead to more or open more doors if you have the experience. I am startup entrepreneur looking for a quality programmer to freelance as project manager for two weeks. Requires a small amount of time but not much pay at this time. May lead to more and maybe vested in the company if right fit.

[iworkforthem]

Why dun you completed your four pet projects?

I'm sure if you complete these projects, you will feel adrenaline again. It is quite clear that money is not something that make you tick. Making things does, and when you are not able to deliver/get it, your interest dwindle... Quit thinking, and complete those projects.