[alphabettsy]

Any implications are based on exactly what you said. You painted a picture of the scenario about like looking through Jello.

In one sentence you say you made an inappropriate comment and apologized, and later lament that one misconstrued comment can cost you a job, but that’s not what happened.

It seems like you still don’t feel any responsibility. Maybe the woman did tempt you, I don’t know what she said, but you make it seems as if she made the words come from your mouth. If she made sexually suggestive comments first, that’s wrong and she should’ve been disciplined as well, but how is anyone to know that when you can’t be straightforward.

[throwaway84538]

I never said I made an inappropriate comment, I said I hadn't meant to say anything and someone could have construed it as something it wasn't. I apologized because the situation was awkward. Should women who apologize when men are harassing them be automatically considered the guilty party? At what point do I get empathy from you for being put in a situation I clearly did not put myself in. I didn't know this young woman, I hadn't made advances towards her, yet she felt it appropriate to make a very overt sexual advance at me. Yeah I see entirely that I should take responsibility for not immediately having a perfect response to an awkward situation. You've proven the point of every man who doesn't want to mentor with your comments in this thread. Guilty until proven innocent.

[philonoist]

>Any implications are based on exactly what you said. You painted a picture of the scenario about like looking through Jello.

Not at all. It is fault of our premature judgemental attitude. I have shown this how[0]. I will further prove how abysmal your comprehension skills are for all the irony to accuse him of that.

>It seems like you still don’t feel any responsibility. Maybe the woman did tempt you, I don’t know what she said, but you make it seems as if she made the words come from your mouth.

Wait a minute, so it is mere tempting if a woman does it, but sexual harassment when men does unconsented exhibition of penis? It is that easy to brush it off as be disciplined?

Did the OP request her to twerk her arse? I side with OP and yes, he shouldn't burden responsibility. She alone is responsible for making the words come out of his mouth especially in fatigue. It was non-sexual and inappropriate. That doesn't give anybody any right to fire. This is why men are not mentoring women. Your comment adds weight to their decision.

And more over, the way he said it matters more than what he said it? Like his grammar and presentation is all of a sudden the reason to judge?

As I have written it before[0] - The OP's situation is also the time where people in same page say acceptable light-hearted comments which otherwise would be inappropriate or lewd. These comments are passed by women themselves routinely and accepted very well by bosses. For I have seen women spank a guy's arse and praise "sexy!" in stationary rooms or pull tie and ask something work related with innuendos, etc. I mean obviously an action gets a reaction, however confused or exhausted it may be. In fact, many do have a slip of tongue in exhaustion, how so ever we press hard to deny them of their own life experiences. We should not treat men like they don't matter, they are constantly doubted, they are not valued and be dismissed just because the opposite party in the situation happens to be a woman.

There should be laws that outright fire these women with a code of conduct stamp as sexual harasser. That is the supposed real world we should give women to train them to treat men with respect and stop gas-lighting them.

>In one sentence you say you made an inappropriate comment and apologized, and later lament that one misconstrued comment can cost you a job, but that’s not what happened.

He apologized "any way" which means he didn't want trouble in times of paranoia and wants to assuage. Even an apology is not enough these days. It doesn't mean he acknowledges his "mistakes". And you wonder why men don't mentor women?

Why is it so hard to think that inappropriate comments can be non-sexual in nature and doesn't deserve running to parents like kids. He didn't even imply anything sexual[1]. It was you who were quick to judge. You should take responsibility. He did lose his job. He wrote that clearly in the first few sentences itself[1] and also other comment[2].

[0]https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=19971760 [1]https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=19969673 [2]https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=19975794