Hacker News new | ask | show | jobs
by phamjamstudio 2606 days ago
My wife and I did this as our first date when we first started dating; we're both Christian if you're wondering why someone would do this on a first date. Unexpectedly, the lady we were to visit literally lived her last hour before she passed away before our eyes. We listened and comforted her husband for the next hour or so. We also listened to the CNA make the difficult calls to her children, some of which were out of state. It was a somber and humbling experience. Our seniors need love just as much as we do.
2 comments

Wow that's a pretty intense experience for a first date.
and probably the reason they are married.
we're both Christian if you're wondering why someone would do this on a first date

What does both of you identifying as christian have to do with anything? Are non-christians less likely to do empathetic things?

It's certainly worth knowing that Christianity, like most religious beliefs or philosophies, does not have a monopoly on empathy, kindness, or service, nor is its profession a guarantee that someone makes those things a studied part of their practice.

But the commentor's claims seem limited to Christianity as a motivator for their behavior, which is hardly objectionable and a very different thing from your challenge-reading of their words.

Well, according to some statistics yes...

https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2017/oct/30/religious-p...

but saying christians visit the elderly for a first date does not necessarily imply nobody but christians are generous in any way.

Well, according to some statistics yes...

And there it is.

While I'm sure a study conducted by the "Institute on Faith & Giving" and published by a Moonie paper is objective it misses quite a bit by assuming that donating to charity is the only measure of empathy or generosity.

https://www.philanthropy.com/article/America-s-Generosity-Di...

Take a look a the states that rank towards the bottom of the list (mostly New England) and those that rank at the top (e.g. Alabama). Or take a look at how empathy is framed as a McCain vs Obama thing. What's missing from that sort of narrative is that Obama pushed government welfare where McCain fought it, that Massachusetts will have far more mature safety nets than Alabama. Supporting universal access to health care is no less empathetic than donating to a religious charity, the only difference is in who you trust to dole out the resources.

Another difference would be that the kind of redistribution Obama favors is compelled for one side of the equation while charity is more or less voluntary depending upon your vision of what the divine requires.
Another difference would be that the kind of redistribution Obama favors is compelled for one side of the equation

Sure, and there are plenty of welfare programs that predate Obama. Welfare programs that were, in large part, created by elected officials.

As others have pointed out, I mainly mentioned our faith as the reason that drives us to serve the greater community such as the seniors at the hospice care center we visited; I almost didn't but i thought it was worthwhile given it's probably an uncommon first date.

I have and love many family members and friends who aren't Christian who of course have done similarly empathetic things out of the goodness of their heart; I'm sure we can all name such people in our lives - we should share their stories too.

I really appreciate the author and in light of this story, all the health care employees who work tirelessly to support and care for the ailing and downtrodden. This is what "loving your neighbor as you would love yourself" means.