[wiz21c]

I second this. What I expect from someone to help is : just listen and show compassion. Compassion in its literal sense means : "suffer with". I don't ask people to suffer, but just to be with me inside my suffering, ie, recognize that I suffer, recognize that this suffering is true, and that staying in that suffering for a while is ok. By not acting, one comfort the other in its own view of the world, make him at peace with it.

Once that bond has been made, then one can start to work on improving things.

All of this requires time and a lot of energy.