[unquietcode]

It is the single strongest reason I continually try to migrate myself away from long-term use of these drugs. While I have basically accepted that I will probably need to be on these or similar medications for the rest of my life, the side effect profiles and withdrawal symptoms of even a single missed dose is a punch to the gut. As soon as you are feeling better and like you want to go and enjoy life, you can't. It is all very frustrating and makes me question whether being alive will for me ever be a truly enjoyable experience.

Nausea, tremors, memory loss--these are just the basics. Throw in anhedonia and loss of desire for good measure, and long after you've stopped the medications too.

The options as I see them are either: be miserable, and probably just die, or: be not miserable, but sabotaged and unable to actually enjoy your newfound life. This usually just leads to a cycle of starting and stopping medications, desperately trying to have a happy yet functional life that is worth living.