Is there a difference? A lot of people would only want to visit in NY or SF but plenty others would happily live their whole lives there. The existence of a vibrant culture should tell you that some people do like living there (otherwise the culture wouldn't exist).
That's fair. I agree. I didn't think about it that way at all. I've lived in NYC for all but 6 years of my life so I'm definitely in the could live in large metropolis my whole life category