[davak]

As somebody that has this specific discussion regularly, I find that framing it as a group has helped in circumstances similar to yours. Framing it this way to your family and the health care team may help.

“This decision is so difficult, let us share this burden with you. If we have to make a decision to remove life support, you shouldn’t have to make that decision alone. If we decide the massive costs of long term life support which may drain the estate, we should make that decision together.

Dad would trust that we as a family would come together and make these tough decisions together.”

People go through various stages of mourning so sometime just time helps.

Remember that the family’s job is to be your Dad’s voice. What would he want?

Events like this bring out the worst in everybody. These are just a few strategies that have worked for me in the past. Good luck.