[zbentley]

Make an appointment with a mental health professional. They can help you contextualize what is going on (is it burnout? Depression? Maybe something with a physiological cause? Is your current gig not a good place for you?) way more effectively than a forum of your peers. I’m sure many people here can relate to some/all of what you describe, but that doesn’t make them qualified to answer your question as it applies to you as a whole person. Professionals, while not perfect, are much better at doing that.

[faceareugly]

Will try doing it. While it could be a problem, I'm leaving in another country so the language is still the problem.