[everybodyknows]

What you call "cheating and dishonesty" most of the world's population thinks of as nothing other than valuing the good of self and family ahead of that of strangers.

Adults who treat strangers as well as family are scarce indeed in this world, even within societies where the principle is universally inculcated in children by all of church, school and family.

If what you say of Indian culture is true -- well, such is the world norm.

[coldtea]

>What you call "cheating and dishonesty" most of the world's population thinks of as nothing other than valuing the good of self and family ahead of that of strangers.

And who said that that's noble?

If everybody did the same and had no moral limits of putting "the good of self and family ahead of that of strangers", then society would be a hellhole.

In fact, it would also come to bite them and their family in the ass too, because society would be a hellhole for them as well. Others can play the game of putting "the good of self and family ahead of that of strangers" as well, and to them its yourself and your family who are the strangers.

>Adults who treat strangers as well as family are scarce indeed in this world

You don't have to "treat strangers as well as family" to not cheat in exams.

You can still give your money to family and none to strangers, take care of family members in sickness and not strangers, protect family members when they're under attack but not strangers, give house and shelter to family members and not to strangers, etc.

Cheating exams and stealing someone's place (that they were actually worth it) doesn't imply you have to "treat strangers as well as family".

And how about caring about your family and kids enough to give them principles, and not make them cheaters, liars, cowards, and beggars who only value themselves and/or their family, and are otherwise useless weight to society?

[octokatt]

What you're saying makes sense.

What is unfortunate is that making moral decisions has a price. If you are trying to give the best life possible to your children, the price of honesty may be too high.

Instead, you may try to give your children a good enough life so they will be able to be the person you wish you could be. Children, here, can mean literal children, nieces, or close family friends who you want to be better than yourself.

[justtopost]

If your legacy to your children is dishonesty, you are giving them the largest possible handicap I can imagine.

[octokatt]

Just saw this. The legacy to your children is to sacrifice for them, be honest with them about what you did, and trust them to do better than you were able to do. Hopefully, the advantage you give them will be enough they can start making the system more fair.

It's ugly, but honor and honesty are things you need to be able to afford.

If your choice was to cheat on an arbitrary test or not be able to afford medicine for your child, it gets sticky.

[krageon]

Handicap to what? Certainly not material wealth. Morals aren't the first thing on your mind when you are trying to claw your way out of abject poverty.

[devonkim]

When taken to an extreme, self-preserving behaviors may be considered enablement - something actually harmful to the growth and ultimate potential of an individual in certain contexts. The ultra-wealthy dynasties to an extent practice both nepotism and meritocratic beliefs within their private lives. People rarely seem to think that coddled children (aside from perhaps literal royalty) are a net positive across cultures and history, for example. I have “people of means” relatives but they have not been a material factor in my successes (nor failures) and while they may help family to some extent, it is well understood how entangling money and family can ruin both things and the policy is to assist where it makes sense long-term but that earning your place is important for both family honor and sustainability. Lying / cheating has a time and place (primarily to save one’s family from peril or to correct injustices and wrongs against the family) but when it comes to measuring raw merit at least my family to my understanding, despite many old world tendencies, does not compromise here.

[deogeo]

Are you really equating dishonesty and valuing family over strangers? Do you believe there's no way to value family over strangers, without cheating and being dishonest?

[vonseel]

Sources, please. This sounds like bullshit to me.

[coldtea]

Sources for what? Parent didn't make some scientific or factual claim, just shared a point of view.