[madhadron]

There is a word in applied behavior analysis: enrichment. An animal kept in a plain concrete cage develops stereotyping behaviors (pacing back and forth endlessly, rubbing so much on the same corner that fur falls out). The solution is enrichment, adding things to the environment that engage attention and are reinforcing at a healthy level when engaged with. What qualifies as the right amount of enrichment varies. A box turtle needs a few interesting objects to turn over, drag around, break, crawl over. A cockatoo...a cockatoo will engage to destruction with everything you have the mental space to give it and then start on your house. They're like toddlers with high intelligence and beaks that can bite through wood. (We do not have a cockatoo.)

When you accept all this stuff into your world, it is for enrichment. So is playing sports with friends who having a cup of tea and catching up with someone.

I have found that my guilt over not keeping up went away entirely when I switched to this. I don't have an obligation to this stuff. It has an obligation to me for giving it rent-free space in my head.

[hippich]

I wish there was a higher level being to recognize my stereotyping behavior and put appropriate enrichment into my environment. Because from where I sit I do not see it as repetitive, nor it does not make me feel guilty, but perhaps sad if something does not work out. But maybe from outside this is exactly what that caged animal was doing..

[madhadron]

> I wish there was a higher level being to recognize my stereotyping behavior and put appropriate enrichment into my environment.

You're not alone. This is why therapy and coaching are a thing. It's not quite the same thing, but having someone to reflect with you and help you lay things out is useful.