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by gf263 2723 days ago
As a 20 something without kids, my parenting idea would be to just not give them any trauma and let them be their own people
3 comments

That's like saying that all programmers have to do is make the program and not make any bugs ;)

The how is the important part!

How to draw an owl: a step-by-step buide.

Step 1: Draw two overlapping circles. Step 2: Draw the rest of the fucking owl.

You won't know until you have kids, though the way that you and your spouse were raised will be a good indicator. If you were raised differently, some reconciliation will be needed otherwise control will revert to the more "activist" parent. And having one kid won't tell you what it's like to have two, though your relationships with your siblings may be predictive.

I'm now of the opinion that behavior is driven by genetics to a considerable extent. Self disciplined parents with perfect control of their emotions will have self disciplined kids with perfect control of their emotions. These are also the people for whom all parenting methods work. For everybody else... good luck.

When do you consider a child to be their own person? What about all the years before that?
Day 1. Birth. My experience is they come with personalities from the first day. They just need more help early on. My goal is to mold them into autonomous agents to act. Each kid is on that path. Age is just a number, but I'm shooting to be mostly done by the time each hits 18.