[watwut]

How do you know they are content? They are literally not allowed to talk about own unhappiness when it happens to them. Monk rules are pretty strict, they have to deal with own crises without raising voice and are often not allowed to talk to outside world in privacy or in public.

[dangerkitteh]

Where are you getting this data? I've known many monks (and nuns too for that matter) and you are encouraged to discuss when you are unhappy. No abbot wants a miserable monk, so they work with you to be sure you are happy and adjusting well to the life. If not, then you mutually come to a decision about what to do next, even if that means leaving the monastery. Implying that they are some sort of prisoner is inaccurate.

[watwut]

Most I gathered from current catholic journals, interviews and forums. They occasionally write about it, because it interest catholic. These are not secrets, they are wrote about so that other catholics can appreciate how hard it is to be nun or monk.

Catholics nuns and monks are supposed to live cloistered and contemplative life, a lot (sometimes completely) isolated inside a monastery. Per definition. Note that sisters and brothers are something a bit different, they work in outside world and make different vows. The formation takes years, but once it is over, they take solemn vows and that is supposed to be for life. That is what you promises. The solemn vows make you nun or monk and you are not supposed to change opinion after. Obviously it is possible to leave, it is not even legal to keep you by force. But if you do that after vows religious consequences do follow.

Whether road outside is easy or difficult for those still in formation depends on monastery in question while it being easier now. I read both types of accounts. But all in all, it is supposed to be hard and my understanding was that every nun and monk goes through hard times (that is partly why they really did not liked defections in past and punished them - defection makes it harder on others in formation).

How hard final rules are depend on monastery. But most strict one limit your ability to talk to up to two hours a day. It is called recreation - you however do work at that time that requires talking and silent work otherwise. Friendships are regulated, you are not supposed to have special relationship with someone else, all should be treated the same including emotionally. In another monastery I read about man did lonely work whole day not talking and had one hour a day where they walked with partner and walked - you was told who it will be and you switched so that they spent same amount of time with everybody.

The way monks and nuns talk, without emotions is also because regulations, rules and vow of obeisance make them so. Talking with anger is wrong for them, content is how you are supposed to look like.

The vow of silence (useless and idle words are forbidden) and obeisance are quite important when speaking of potential happiness, you are really not supposed to say no to superior even if superior changed and is someone different you may not personally fit. If you are unhappy after such change, tough luck. Note the impact of vow of silence on your ability to discuss and compare experiences with fellow monks.

Another interesting bit is that a lot of formation is literally about making you as obeisant as possible, assigning you tasks that are useless while you are supposed to gently smile, answer "yes brother" and fill the hole you just dug. That is expected, just like in army training they have as purpose to fill you into certain mold.

[thedaemon]

There are many religions with monks, they do not share the same rules. To which one are you specifying?

[watwut]

Catholics. I mean nun and monks not sisters and brothers specifically.

[rthomas6]

FWIW, I had Buddhist monks in mind. I don't have any direct empirical evidence this is true, but their methods have been and continue to be empirically validated (to increase subjective wellbeing, decrease stress markers, increase empathy, and improve health), so it's not unlikely this is the case. Full disclosure, meditation helps me in my own life, so I am definitely biased.