[alan_wade]

How do people end up finding friends online? I spend 90% of my time online, I post on forums, but I didn't end up making even one lasting online relationship. It seems like a fun thing to do though, how does that usually happen?

[Warhost95]

I don’t think the types of relations as described above are a result from primarily text based conversation, but years of gaming with the other person until 3 a.m. and while doing so, being on Teamspeak, Discord and the like. Talking to the person really makes these connections much deeper. I once started using in-game voice chat and simply asked the person something, and just from hearing his “yes” I could tell he was the same nationality as I and could even pin down the region from his accent, so the conversation started and became quite interesting.

Not saying this can’t be happening through forums, but I’d say it’s less likely and slower.

[hndamien]

The other difference is that there is some authentication. I generally don’t play with a mic and I have some “friends” I enjoy having very minimal text chat, but mostly because they are good players. I do t consider these significant because I don’t talk. If I did, they may be surprised I’m a middle age Aussie guy, up way too late playing with the US. The authentication that voice offers makes it far more personal.

[SpaceManNabs]

It is pretty easy. Back in WCIII, I had my clan when we used to do semi pro matches. I even ran a bot called Ghost++ for my clan so that we could have "LAN" games even when I was gone. Now that I play DotA, people usually add me after a game (I am pretty decent at the level I am rated since I watch a lot of games but don't play often). Hell, you can go on the DotA 2 subreddit right now and post in the "make a team" posts.

Like others said, voice chat also makes the connection much faster. Get on Ventrilo (RIP), party chat, or discord!

[noir_lord]

In my case IRC, I started hanging around a programming channel related to a particular framework, over time we all pretty much moved off that framework for various reasons but a core group of us just spun a new IRC channel and moved over there.

It's now my digital watercooler (I'm the only dev at work), interestingly many of the other regulars are sole devs or small company devs where they are the lead dev.

[saurik]

How old are you? Like, serious question: if is a generally reported experience that people start to suck at randomly making friends as they approach 30.

[anyfoo]

Age does sound like a likely explanation. When I was younger, I made friends online pretty much the same as offline: Some people I just got along with very well, at some point hung out and talked with them more consciously (online or offline or both).

Now that I'm older, that barely happens. Online or offline, even while I do meet new people and some friendship forms on some level, a certain distance remains and things often stay confided to a particular function (lunch group at work, people in an online group).

I first tried to fight it, but now I suspect that I'm just more interested in furthering the relationships that I already have, instead of making room for new ones.

[ethbro]

I was thinking about this recently and decided it's probably another culprit: we're less tolerant of unexpected and different things as we get older.

That seems kind of essential for younger-esque 'Hey, stranger who I know nothing about? Want to spend a lot of time together?'

[bitexploder]

But they suck at it because they lack the time due to other adult obligations (kids, spouses, work, etc).

[ksec]

Battles, and Hard Work. Someone mentioned WoW below, it was the first widely popular MMORPG, the scale was dozen times larger than any previous MMORPG. And to get good or the fun, you have to join Raid and Guild. There were no quick way to do it, no Pay to win like we have today. Everyone joins and help each other in the Guild if you want to grow. And through having the Same Goal, overcome the impossible battles you have and hours spending time in Teamspeak ( Do they still use it today ), you form friendship.

It is much easier to have friendship when everyone have the same goal.

[BearsAreCool]

Many of my best online friends I have through having shared a faction in an online game. Working as a team with them led to the initial favorable views and relationships with each other which I think is vital, which then grew into out of character friendships which went beyond the game.