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by xupybd 2743 days ago
I don’t recommend going down this road. As you grow older you may regret it.

Working can be rewarding. The rat race sucks but getting older you may want a family and reasonable income is really important for a family.

Maybe there is a way you can participate in the economy without being so unhappy about it?

1 comments

While this is a good response in terms of likely outcomes, it's important to respect OP's right to make his own decisions. In this case, he did make a decision and decided to gather advice on how to fill that in on a forum of people he trusts. It would be very aggravating to me to receive replies that essentially say "what you want is just a phase, you should stop wanting that and want something else".
I don't think that giving appropriate advice is disrespectful of one's right to make decisions.

If a friend asks you for tips on how to do something stupid and self-harming (according to your judgment), it's okay to say "Don't do this" and not help them. Actually, that might be the best thing you can do for them.

I respect the OP is in charge of his own life. I’m simply offering some input that may not be obvious to someone younger. People helped me out in a similar way. I’m so happy they did.

Can you elaborate as to why you are aggravated?

I suspect that while we both got similar advice in the past, we respond differently to people telling us not to do things. I don't love just being told "what you want is a bad idea" especially if it's as nebulous as general life advice/direction. For this reason I end up not listening to it, even though there might be good underpinnings. I try to let people make their own mistakes, there is not really a wrong choice to make - it's their life after all.

This is all assuming that "don't do this thing you're doing" is something that the OP has heard before, of course. It seems pretty obvious that it's not something most people would find a good idea. I assume that's one of the reasons they're asking here.

No one enjoys hearing people disagree with their decisions but sometimes it's the best thing for us. There are wrong choices that people make. I've made lots of those choices. I've also had some help avoiding some of those choices.

Please don't miss understand my response. I'm not saying don't do what you're doing. I'm saying the path they're considering may not put them in the place want when they're older. Trying to hint that they may be happier if they shoulder some of the burden they're trying to avoid. That while at the moment it might seem like a good deal there is a hidden cost. As you get older you realize that you only get so much time and you may wake up one day wishing you'd gotten further in life.

There is also a lot of joy that comes from taking on responsibility and mastering it. It would be a shame to miss out on that.