How would a government lose control of keys generated and stored within a offline HSM in a shielded room, without actually losing possession of that HSM? This is very obviously not unfeasible to implement in a secure manner.
So far you've only given examples of secrets which are really easy to lose control of, this simply isn't one.
I'm not trying to argue that this should be done, you claimed this can't be done which is obviously false
If you do know what HSMs are, do you believe that they’re all useless?
Idk where the “lol!” came from, we’re talking about extremely standard cryptographic key storage here.