Hacker News new | ask | show | jobs
by always_good 2755 days ago
I think I have some lasting trauma for the year I was on call.

I still have nightmares that I'm getting woken up into a hellish situation to fix code I've never seen at 3am. Or that I'm out on a date or having a beer or trying to enjoy my life when I get called.

I remember the constant state of anxiety just knowing I could be called. Couldn't even wind down watching a movie much less read a book. I quit when I realized I felt a sense of relief commuting to work the next morning because I wouldn't have to field an emergency by myself.

I also remember fantasizing about being a cafe barista or security guard that year. Waited way too long to get out.

3 comments

I did that for a few years, although your job sounds a bit more stressful than mine was most of the time. I never got paid extra, but the job had some nice perks.

I am way happier now that I don't have to carry my laptop with me 24/7 and worry about taking it out while on a date or running off to find a hallway or corner to sit in and do work during the middle of a movie or concert. Sometimes I'd even get an emergency phone call during my commute and have to pull off the freeway to work.

Done it for at least 10 years, and I gotta say, as soon as I stopped, the anxiety MOSTLY went away.

That said, just the other day (after 18 months off), I twitched a bit when my text message notification went off.

And of course, it affects everyone differently.

> I think I have some lasting trauma for the year I was on call.

I can relate, I get big anxiety rush anytime my phone rings ever since.