| First,HN isn't a good place to seek help regarding you suicidal thoughts,which you should definetly see someone about. You're over estimating too many things and using too much emotion in your analysis. Objectively speaking,you should define your life goals first and evaluate your abilities. In my opinion,for "modern" or any other life,your career is primarily important to take care of yourself and your dependents. Even homeless people lead a life worth living. Life can always get worse or better. Yes,natural abilities are imoortant but perseverance and wit are more decisive in succeeding(even in programming). Therein lies your weakness based on what I gather from your question. The fact that you gave up to easily and didn't attempt to at least "fake it till you make it" is a big problem. I don't consider myself talented in STEM either but I am confident I can debug myself out of a segfault most days,primarily because of the ridiculous amount of time I spent with C and gdb debugging simple code mistakes. I don't know if I'd make a good programmer but since they want uni education in compsci,I focused in IT fields which is working out great for me. In the end,I think you'll do fine in general. I don't know if STEM or compsci is for you based on what you mentioned but my advice is to at least persistently pursue your dreams. I would also highly recommend investing in relationships with people(personal,academic and professional) life is too hard on your own. |
I understand what you mean, but it's just so hard for me to keep up with other people. I am just awkward and I do not know how to interact with them. I literally have a relationship maintenance problem, in a way :D
>In the end,I think you'll do fine in general. I don't know if STEM or compsci is for you based on what you mentioned but my advice is to at least persistently pursue your dreams. I would also highly recommend investing in relationships with people(personal,academic and professional) life is too hard on your own.
Indeed. Thanks a lot for replying and for the encouraging message:)