[Twirrim]

Practice, practice, practice. I find it hard as all heck not to be in problem solving mode. That's essentially what we do in the tech industry in our jobs. Take a problem, break it down to manageable chunks and fix the them.

Do some digging around and read up on "Active Listening". The bare bones of it are just to hear what the person is saying, and reflect it back. "It sounds like you're frustrated because <paraphrase>." If you're attempting to accurately paraphrase, it will take quite some concentration on what someone is saying. The devil is in the details, and so is a lot of subtleties.

It might be worth seeing a counsellor, they're trained in, and can help you to develop, these kinds of skills.