[Bartweiss]

On a related note, what happens at parties where lots of people don't know each other? (Assuming that happens at all.)

As much as smalltalk is unneeded in everyday life, having a script that brings out some general background ("so what do you do?", "are you from around here?", "how do you know {host}?") does help when strangers are looking for common ground where they can talk more deeply.

[vlehto]

In Finland we have these things called "Pönötys" and "kursaileminen". I'm half kidding, but half serious. Pönötys means awkward formal standing when you are wearing a suit or can of beer, but don't know where to put your hands or anybody to talk to. It actually happens a lot. "Kursaileminen" is kind of pretending that you don't need anything and have nothing to say. It's finnish way of being polite because you are not bothering anybody. Also happens quite a lot.

You do both of those and then you sneak to someone and ask them anything. It might well be "how do you know the host?" But Finns are quite flexible with the subjects because there is no culture of what you ought to speak about. You can ask anything, you don't have to ask anything. But do expect to get a throughout and honest answer.

It's great if you're imaginative and curious or if you want to be left alone. But if you fall in the middle it can get difficult.

[setr]

Thats exactly the same as a world with smalltalk

Bullshit questions that you ask in hopes of stumbling into something interesting to talk about (ie how well do you know the host) is the essence of smalltalk.

We just continue starting with the useless questions even if we already have an actual topic to work with ;)