[schizoidboy]

I was in a similar state of mind and things turned around after pursuing more meaningful work in biotech. There's a whole subfield of Psychology that researches how people find meaningful work and it helped me greatly. A few places to start:

https://dx.doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2015.1137623

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLFVoEF2RI0