[neoburkian]

Straight male here. My favorite ASMR video is of a dude wearing a fish person mask, eating fudge, and talking to a pineapple [1].

Can you explain to me how exactly this is "soft core phone sex"? Am I unconsciously gay for fish-men?

What you are talking about does happen, but I think you are painting with waay too broad a brush.

[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2v1-PQ2cmo&

[qualitative]

Ha ha! That video is on another level entirely. The appeal of that particular channel has nothing to do with ASMR, and you know it.