| I have so many things to say! 1. It's okay to just want to get work done and get paid and go home. That's what most people do in most jobs, even in tech. Flashy VC-chasing startups are a little bubble, over-represented on HN and in the media. Most of tech workers are working outside of that bubble and are doing exactly what you want (in terms of hours per week and compartmentalization). 2. The semi-annual schedule you want is also okay, but much less common. Because it's less common, fewer project managers and departments are ready to adapt to it. And as an intermediate developer (rather than a senior) you have less leverage to ask them to adapt. This is why you're not telling them ahead of time, and why you're left feeling "dirty". 3. It's good you want to normalize things and be more open about your preferences and needs. It's a sign of maturity in your career (and maybe yourself). And I think you have a few things to think about going forward: - Why do you want to leave places after 9-12 moths. Is it just because you like to take a few months to yourself. Would you be willing to go back to the same place after the break? To a hiring company, that's a hugely more palatable than if you just disappear, and is exactly the kind of thing you can directly negotiate after you've qualified for a job and before accepting an offer. - Do you just want different projects (after your break)? Then you can absolutely apply to an agency or contracting firm. Many have struggle to maintain 100% utilization for their workers and would welcome people who are okay on their own between assignments. If you can slip off their roster/payroll during slow times and hop back on when work picks up again, they'll be happy! - Do you want to just avoid commitment altogether? Then consider independent contracting. You take on a bunch of other responsibilities (hustling for work, nagging for payment, etc) but you can take unpaid breaks whenever you want and you can structure engagements so that you're not working with clients for longer than you'd want. You're in control of everything. TLDR: there are probably hundreds of thousands of people like you. Maybe millions. Figure out the next detail in what you need and you'll see the path ahead. |
I spent the middle decade of my career with a partner at home who needed regular care-taking. I needed to put that ahead of any traditional career treadmill and so I worked remotely for a mid-sized contracting firm and was clear about my availability. They gave me the work I needed, and I preserved the time and space I needed.
Because I worked for the same firm all that time, and did good work, I established a strong and trusting relationship that afforded me increasingly more flexibility and control.
Plus, by volunteering to support the other sides of the business like Sales, Recruiting, etc I learned more than enough about contracting to be quite confident and successful when I eventually decided to go out on my own -- which gave me even more control.
I can't tell you if it's a path that would make sense for you, but it was a very rewarding one for me.