[akullpp]

Oh boy, exactly the same happens at my company. Everyone is available and communicating even when on paternity/maternity leave or on vacation somewhere on an island.

Many people see their value directly tied to their career and one of the major ways to make you (feel) important is to be present. It also helps your career since many old companies value presence over other criteria.

I'm three weeks ill now and for the first time, I begin to understand that I've never been detached from work. In the first two weeks I actually became so depressed because I couldn't work. I need to do something, don't know what yet. This is bad for my relationships and for my mental health.

[KozmoNau7]

I worked hard to break that habit in myself. My workplace (telco) gives all employees a phone and home internet, both with unlimited subscription, 100% free for private use as well, and a cable TV package if we want it. The purpose is that we can work from home as necessary, and obviously also act as brand ambassadors. Our phones are eligible for replacement every 3 years or so, for free.

For a lot of my colleagues, this is their only phone, because why wouldn't it be? Many of them habitually check their work email all the damn time, and I can see them online in Skype for Business, even when they're on vacation. I used to do that as well, compounded by a manager who expected to be able to reach us at any time.

So I bought a phone and personal subscription for myself, and most days I leave the laptop and work phone in my locker at work. Now when I'm off work, I'm off work, period.

A few trusted colleagues have my unlisted personal phone number, in case of serious emergencies only, but they haven't had to use it yet.

As for what to do with yourself, you need a hobby :-) Something completely unrelated to work, like bicycling or video games or woodworking. Something you do for yourself and/or your family.

[distances]

My workplace provides a phone too, but doesn't require out-of-hours availability. I've written down my number in the company internal phone book, but I doubt any of my colleagues took it from there; I also don't have work email even configured in my phone, and haven't installed VPN access for my home computer.

I pretty much can't work outside of the office. Makes it very easy to keep work and leisure separated.

[k_wantified]

What about if your relationships and mental health are terrible, so you work to ease the pain of that?

[gordaco]

That's a bit like... your relationships and mental health are terrible, so you take drugs (especially alcohol) to ease the pain of that. It might get you some temporary relief, but in the long run the consequences might be far worse than the original problem(s) you were running away from.

[pm90]

Well put!

Its easy to think that using work as a distraction (rather than something destructive like excessive alcohol or drugs) may be OK, but its really not. And most employers will more than willingly accept you working all the time.

Don't fall into the trap. Work is very important, and yes you will work really hard sometimes for time-sensitive things and on-call duties. But it should be understood that those things are anomalies, not something to be expected all the time.