[potatote]

As an immigrant, that was one of the cultural adjustment that I had to do in the US. In my home country in SE Asia, people usually ask "Have you eaten (have you had a meal)?" as a greeting. It's easier to answer with "No, I haven't." or "Yes, I just had lunch" for example.

But when I moved to the states for college, I was perplexed as to how to answer "How're ya?" or "What's up?". :D I learned to answer that question with a standard, "I'm good. Thank you". But even nowadays, I sometimes venture to answer it honestly like, "I'm okay. [insert some really honest reason why I'm just okay]" or "I'm busy, but it's all good".

This is just a small example of adjustment that I made as I try to settle in my new home.

[EGreg]

I am in Russia now. I can say that people do smile normally if they feel like the conversation warrants it. But there’s not so much “fake” tinseltown hollywood pleasantry.

Americans in the US have a saying “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” It is a culture very much fine tuned for business, which is why you want to make sure to grease the wheels of an interaction, and there is nothing to be gained by being straightforward with what you actually think. It’s avoidance of conflict and closing of a sale.

I remember when my grandparents immigrated to the USA they would relate stories like:

1) A woman would approach and say “hi, how are you”? And they would start answering but she would just walk on by LOL

2) My grandfather would offer a seat to a woman but she just started yelling at him for doing it.

Later, they adjusted. But even the word “you” — which Russians thought is “rude” because there is no “polite You” for strangers — actually is the polite version of Thou, because (unlike the Amish) the English got so polite that they just stopped using Thou altogether!

[Jach]

There's a lot of variations so even some natives will share your frustrations, though personally I think the option variety is a nice feature. You can have amusing moments when you've queued up an automatic response and get the wrong trigger. "Gorgeous day huh?" "I'm well, you? Err..." Sometimes just ACK-ing works well if you really don't want to think about it... "What's up?" "Sup." "Howdy?" "Howdy." Regional / cultural greeting patterns can be used though to initiate moving from total stranger to closer stranger more quickly when you reply in certain ways... "Wazzup?" "Wazzzzuuuuup." (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3oL7v7PLac)

[akvadrako]

Well I'm a native born American and I always answer it honestly. There is always something up, either at work or with my family or friends. It doesn't hurt to spend 10 words mentioning it.

[jacobsenscott]

In the US if you ask someone if they've eaten there's a good chance they'll think you're asking them out to dinner.

[niij]

> Have you eaten yet

This is a greeting in quite a few SE Asian countries that I'm aware of. I've heard of it for Thailand (gin khao mai), Myanmar, and Singapore. I always answered yes/the default answer. But maybe I'll try no next time I visit for free lunch? :)