[obelos]

There's a difference between trying to influence how your kids turn out (for some value of “turn out”), and approaching your parenting in a way that facilitates the ease of your ongoing personal relationship with them. Your choices and actions as a parent may not be able to make them smarter than they are naturally inclined, but you can make your own relationship with them better or worse based on your choices.

But yeah, not worrying overmuch about the outcomes does allow parents to enjoy the ride and help their kids feel the love, attention, and structure that facilitates them growing into themselves.