Oh, also: https://www.openshift.com/products/pricing/ is kind of like what you're talking about. It may not have everything, but it's managed k8s on your cloud with support.
Closer. Things like being able to see the logs of all your apps and searching them is a common thing I assume. We have all the tools today, that's not the problem. The problem is me having to read pages like [0] just to do what almost 100% of companies have to do. I am having trouble articulating the simplicity of what I would expect.
0 - https://docs.openshift.com/enterprise/3.1/install_config/agg...