Ask HN: What is a good book on how to negotiate?

[jumpship]

I'm looking for a book that will give me insight into the expectations of the person on the other side of the negotiation, with the assumption that they are well practiced in the art. And having that insight, how to negotiate in good faith.

[anitil]

This is a topic I'm very interested in. I have a few links (no books sorry), and would be keen to talk to you if you're interested (email in bio). I have had fantastic success with negotiating benefits and extra pay, just the other week I received 4 weeks paid paternity leave up front on top of an already generous salary offer. It is a skill worth having

Steli Efti negotiation course (requires email registration) : https://courses.close.io/ Our very own patio11 : https://www.kalzumeus.com/2012/01/23/salary-negotiation/ Valerie Aurora : http://valerieaurora.org/howto_salary/

[andrei_says_]

Thank you for this. The Efti course looks great.

[mrks_]

Never Split the Difference by Christopher Voss

[lazyant]

seconded, and it's like $10

[cuchoi]

We used 3-D Negotiation (https://amzn.to/2Kyvzxx) at my negotiation class at Harvard. What I liked is that it goes through what you should do before sitting to negotiate. In particular, deal design and the setup of the negotiation.

I have also heard great thing about Never Split the Difference (https://amzn.to/2KwiK6K).

[motohagiography]

I have most of an abandoned book written on it. Abandoned because I will finish it when I can show it actually works.

As a foundation, "Getting to Yes," is key, but as another commenter mentioned, it has been considered outdated because it assumes rational parties. This isn't a limit, as you need to play scales before you can play jazz, but there are no "scale recitals."

"Rational," has a few concepts wrapped up in it. Main limit on the basic theories (I would say) is that it focuses on discussing a transaction with a finite outcome, positioning one another in relation to a commitment event. A raise, a consulting rate, price of a car, etc.

Reality is that society has changed, and deals are really more about achieving a temporary political equilibrium. You could say they always were, but strong personal connections and relationships in business aren't as much of a factor as public reputation/image has become. In a graph sense, many "weak ties," are more valuable than a few strong ones.

IMHO, traditional negotiation assumed valuing "strong tie" networks. Negotiation in a "weak tie," network has very different dynamics than a "strong tie," network.

A very useful traditional reference is The Economist Guide: https://www.amazon.com/Economist-Negotiation-Z-Guide-ebook/d...

It is an encyclopedia/dictionary approach to get the concepts and an overview of what people on the other side of the table likely already understand.

Weak tie negotiation uses some of the same traditional techniques, but requires more advanced concepts from some other authors. Maybe I should finish that book.

[gzell]

Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In

[milliondollar]

This is the standard b-school textbook for negotiations class. Very good.

To be clear and in response to other comment, you can't expect everybody to be rational. In my first mock negotiation in that class I got completely hosed. Turns out I totally trusted the other party not to lie. Lesson learned from the b-school *holes.... Part of the class was you have to know your own biases and anticipate some of the other counterparty's.

[tucaz]

Chris Voss says that the approach on this book used to work until they figured out that it is outdated.

The basic idea there, is to prevent confrontation and trying to be rational.

However, people are not rational and emotions play a huge part in our lives so it should not be ignored and should even be leveraged.

Never split the difference is the book that builds on it and add tons of stuff about negotiation. It isn’t easily one of the best books I read (actually heard) and I highly recommend it.

[samstave]

I've heard this is good too - though I haven't read it.

[esbafb8]

Up! Great one, thanks for reminding me of it.

[evla]

Seconded!

[geordee]

I like this book. https://www.amazon.com/Negotiating-Guide-Youll-Revised-Updat...

In fact, you can read a lot of articles in the author’s blog to decide whether to purchase or not.

http://peterstark.com/negotiating-bully-shark-jerk/

[samstave]

The art of the deal - for the anti-negotiator.

(Sorry - I just had to)

[jason_slack]

Check out Jim Camp. I have read a few of his books. One I really benefited from was "Starts With No!".

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3...

[scarface74]

Its not a book, but I thought the Slate podcast series on negotiating was good...

http://www.slate.com/articles/podcasts/negotiation.html

[jrs235]

Herb Cohen's "You Can Negotiate Anything" it's an oldie (70's) but a goodie.

[raadore]

This and his Negotiate This!

[kirankn]

Value Negotiation: By Horacio Falcao https://www.amazon.com/Value-Negotiation-Finally-Win-Win-Rig...

[sidcool]

I am reading (rather listening) the book "Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In" by Roger Fisher, William L. Ury, Bruce Patton.

[Lordarminius]

1.Everything Is Negotiable by Gavin Kennedy

2.Getting to Yes

[BjoernKW]

Roger Dawson's Secrets of Power Negotiating is a classic.