[noufalibrahim]

I second this. I've bought several toys for my kids. Highly desirable ones (from their perspective) - Nerf guns, board games, hobby kits etc. But they get bored of those things in about 3 weeks. LEGO on the other hand is a gift that gives on giving. They randomly pick it up and start making things. We've bought a big basket and dump all the bricks into that so that there's enough variety to build anything.

Interestingly, I bought them a Jenga set a few weeks ago and they spend more time using the wooden bricks to make structures rather than playing the actual game. Maybe there's some instinct that's at work there.

[asmithmd1]

I will probably be banned for this question: Are your kids boys or girls?

Boys and girls have obvious physical differences, yet it is offensive to even whisper that their brains might be different.

[ddingus]

You should not be. I had both. They do work differently, and there is a lot of overlap.

Legos though. Common ground! Almost everyone will get after a pile of legos.

The thing I disliked the most was watching the girls lose interest in some things as social pressure increased on them. Girlie norms. Good for girls, not for boys, kinds of things were in play. Rubbed me the wrong way.

Thing is, some boys are girly, and some girls are boyish. That's OK. Has to be, or we require people to live lies. I sure don't want to do that. How can I require others to do it?

What if it were me? You?

We gotta shake that stuff all off, learn new ideas, new ways for people to better self identify and be good with who they are. We do that so they too can be good with who they are.

As a parent, it was hard to compete with the norms. Was mostly successful, but not to the degree I now feel makes sense. I had help from my kids peers who saw I was open, seeking, just wanting to bring out who I saw developing.

BTW: watching their peers showed me those brain differences aren't just gender driven. Boys and girls, in a general sense, can make these things easy to see.

And people get stuck on all that too. Like they stop right there, when the truth is they should be continuing!

The reality is the kids brains will work differently. A boy who likes to craft and sew happens more often than many understand, just as does the girl who likes to build, take it apart, or race. We tend to celebrate the latter, when we should just celebrate new people, our future.

That's where we need to get to, if you ask me. Let the kids present as who they are, and we can then seek to understand with them and maximize that with and for them.

Many young people today get this cold. A whole lot of norms we struggle with today are going to change for the better. It's a good thing, but will likely continue to be kind of rough for a while yet.

All, FWIW, just observations from the school of hard knocks. :D

[lopmotr]

I think it'll always be an uphill battle. Teenagers especially need to distinguish themselves from the opposite sex for sexual reasons. So whatever's normal for girls is what boys won't want to do and vice versa.

[noufalibrahim]

Oh, One boy and one girl and It's quite obvious to me that they're differently wired. The daughter is older than the son.

They both enjoy making stuff but it's very different. My daughter gets a kick out of making intricate stuff (everything from common household objects like a toothbrush to things more elaborate like a multi shelf cupboard). My son mostly make elaborate planes and cars. He figures out some "technology" (like swinging door or hinge) and then all the things he makes uses that.

[posterboy]

What are those physical differences between children in lego age? The really obvious ones aren't fully developed, not active, so it shouldn't be offensive to suggest that a mental difference, as profound as expressed in lego playing, aren't active, either.

[wibr]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kapla

[noufalibrahim]

Bless you! Thanks!