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by thisismyusernam 3004 days ago
I'm afraid I have to admit that I am one of the leaders they speak about. I am the founder of my own company and have Aspergers, finding it difficult (among other things) to understand, relate to, or work with other people (much less lead them).

I ended up in this position completely by accident and I don't know what to do about it.

I hope I can find somebody else to take over from me and actually be a leader so that I can be less of a drain on my company's growth potential. I'm sure I'd enjoy my life a lot more if I wasn't in a leadership position at all.

4 comments

The point of the article is not about whether you relate to or understand the emotions of the people you have to lead. As a founder, you are very unlikely to be an absentee manager.

Rather, it is describing managers who don't really have a purpose or view on anything.

For example, let's say one of your employees completes a project or assignment. If they ask, "did I do a good job?", would you be able to answer that - do you have a standard for "good" in your mind, a sense of what the company is trying to do, and assess how that project fits with that purpose? If you can do that, you are not an absentee manager. There are good and bad ways give feedback, but doing it at all means you are not an absentee.

The kind of manager being described by the article is unable/unwilling/uninterested in the organization's goals and how their team's efforts fit into the goal. The absentee manager will almost always respond to a request for feedback with "you are doing great, keep it up", regardless of the actual output. This is a soul crushing kind of experience.

Thanks for that clarification. I can still identify with that description, but I believe it's more due to burnout/exhaustion with trying to fill a role that doesn't suit me (i.e. manager) rather than chronic absenteeism as they are describing.
Read the E-Myth. Great book about management.

I read the original, here's the newer one:

https://www.amazon.com/Myth-Revisited-Small-Businesses-About...

I'm working through it now actually thanks. Also similar but (IMHO) better-written is a new book I just started reading, called Finish Big by Bo Burlingham, which covers a lot of the same ground, with more case studies.
Best thing ANY founder can do is be self aware of their skills and find people who can do tasks better than them, and then promote those people.

There's no shame in being a founder and CTO while handing of the CEO role to someone with better management skills.

I've been diagnosed as likely having Asperger's, as a collateral observation when tested for something else.

IMO there are a lot of problems with friends, teammates, etc. that suddenly make sense when viewed through the framework of oneself possibly having Asperger's.

I haven't started it yet, but a supposedly helpful book on the topic is "Asperger's on the Job" by Rudy Simone.

Yes, I can so relate to that – many things fit into place around past conflicts and struggles – really appreciate the book recommendation, I will take a look..