[kolpa]

Does being rejected by cliques at lunch make your experience worse than be rejected by cliques in other activities at work? Would a non-cafeteria workplace, where cliques went outside to eat, or brown-bagged in the break area, or sat each at their own desk, felt less painful?

[caylus]

> Does being rejected by cliques at lunch make your experience worse than be rejected by cliques in other activities at work?

Fair point. I'd say the frustration comes more from the double-talk of "look how inclusive our workplace culture is: everyone eats together in the cafeteria!" The company admitting "we don't have any norms around lunch; everyone is on their own" would not be an objectively better experience, but at least would be honest.

Another option would be to have more official team, group, or project-based lunches, rather than a free-for-all, where specific members of a team privately invite other specific members of a team.

I don't mean to turn this into a rant, just adding a data point :)

[sotojuan]

> Another option would be to have more official team, group, or project-based lunches, rather than a free-for-all, where specific members of a team privately invite other specific members of a team.

That would just lead to people doing small talk and then being on their phones for the whole lunch because they aren't sitting with people they want to talk to.

[Swizec]

> rather than a free-for-all, where specific members of a team privately invite other specific members of a team.

You might not have realized this before, or you may have, but you too can privately invite a bunch of people to lunch. Form your own clique!