[colanderman]

> From my point of view, I would avoid approaching a group of women talking by themselves since I'd be the odd one out.

That is exactly sexism – the subtle, insidious kind that us men tend not to even notice. You aren't the odd one out; you and them are all professionals at a conference.

That many men – the majority of attendees at most tech conferences – make decisions like yours is a major reason why it is more difficult for women to advance in tech fields than men. Behavior like this is exactly what people mean when they talk about "patriarchy". That it's subtle and "innocent" – "I'd be the odd one out" – is what makes us not recognize it in ourselves.

[nitwit005]

> That is exactly sexism – the subtle, insidious kind that us men tend not to even notice

Suppose there is a group of girls at a high school is approached by a single guy that doesn't know them. What is the odds of being welcomed into the conversation without any questioning looks? At least at the high school I went to, it'd pretty low odds. As a consequence, guys learned not to do that.

That stuff carries forward, even if the situation has changed somewhat. You have a population of men trying to be polite. They're not going to approach groups that have given them negative feedback before, because they don't want to be a jerk.

[deanCommie]

Once again: "you and them are all professionals at a conference."

You aren't in high school.

You aren't facing a clique of girls who happen to all live in the same neighborhood and have radically different interests likes and dislikes from you.

You're facing a group of top industry professionals self-selected from around the region/country/world (depending on how large/prestigious of a conference it is).

And the fact that you don't understand this distinction, the fact that you think it's legitimate for a man to categories "groups of women" as "cliques of mean girls" from high school onwards without reflecting or reevaluating the changing circumstances is why society (and more specifically YOU) still have a long way to go to understand what sexism is and is not.

[nitwit005]

Kindly think a little deeper into what you're reading instead of leaping to insult people.

There is a difference between explaining why people do things and approving of it? I was literally explaining why the "insidious" sexism existed. I even quoted what I wanted to elaborate on.

[abacate]

See, that's where we disagree: I'd probably not approach any group talking by themselves in a conference if I was the odd one - the only latino, the only man... you name it.

Maybe I would if I had something to add to the conversation, but to simply socialize? No.

In another context, a social one, maybe... but otherwise I don't see how that would work out.

And that says nothing about any bias, at least I cannot see it that way. Maybe it reflects some sort of insecurity, fear of rejection? Yes for sure. But that goes really far from sexism.